Answers
Actually I am not joking, I really need some support right now. I am 32 weeks pregnant. Oh the stress............
OMG...that's so funny but not. I'm glad to see you still have a sense of humor, that's half the battle. Although I can't help you with the issues regarding the stock market, I can tell you this. When you are pregnant...don't freak until it's absolutely necessary. The stock market is so wacked out right now that nobody knows what to expect or not to expect. Anything can happen. Plan for the worse and hope for the best but remain calm. People make better decisions when they are calm and think clearly. In your case the war is not over yet. Things can turn around with the bail out and the economy can catch up.
Good Luck.
watching the Macintosh introduction, got out of their seats to call their stock brokers from the pay phones to issue a 'buy' order! Smart ...
This may look like a joke, but i am starting young, i have already made my own company and selling ipods and electrical goods bought cheap from china, now i want to invest the money i have made in the stock broking bussiness but dont know where to buy from, I know how the market works and i am part of the london stock exchange but how do i buy in?
Thanks
callum
buyfiles4you@yahoo.co.uk
If you KNOW how the market works, you're the first in the world. I've started to take a keen interest in this line of work when I was about your age. It took a long time of trying, failing, succeeding, failing again, studying, practicing and much more studying and so on to get to the level I operate on now. I encourage you to try to know more of the exchange business, but don't become overconfident. Nobody wins all the time..... Be realistic and careful and one day you'll be whatever you want. Good luck to you.
1. She has no rigors or shaking chills , but her husband states she
was very hot in bed last night.
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
3. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
6. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.
7. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
8. The patient refused autopsy.
9. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound
weight gain in the past three days.
12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
13. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
14. Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you might like to
work her up.
15. She is numb from her toes down.
16. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
17. The skin was moist and dry.
18. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
19. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
20. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
21. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got
a divorce.
22. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
23. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
24. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
25. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
26. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock
broker instead.
27. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
28. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
29. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the
abdomen and I agree.
30. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
31. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
never heard it before but i love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111
Four men went golfing together one day; three headed to the first tee and one went into the club house to take care of the bill. The three men started talking, bragging about their sons. The first man told the others my son is a home builder and he's so successful that he gave a friend a new home - for free.
The second man said, My son was a car salesman and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He's so successful that he gave a friend two Cadillacs.
The third man, not wanting to be outdone bragged, my son is a stock broker and he's doing so well that he gave his friend an entire stock portfolio.
The fourth man decided to joined them on the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first man mentioned, "We were just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?"
The fourth man replied .Well my son is gay. I'm not totally thrilled about it but he must be good. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, two cars, and a stock portfolio."
haha
Four men went golfing together one day; three headed to the first tee and one went into the club house to take care of the bill. The three men started talking, bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder and he's so successful that he gave a friend a new home - for free."
The second man said, "My son was a car salesman and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He''s so successful that he gave a friend two Cadillacs."
The third man, not wanting to be outdone bragged, "My son is a stock broker and he's doing so well that he gave his friend an entire stock portfolio."
The fourth man joined them on the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first man mentioned, "We were just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?" The fourth man replied, "Well, my son is gay. I'm not totally thrilled about it, but he must be good. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, two cars, and a stock portfolio."
Oh and tell me what you think.
LOL! Was good, no offence should be taken, although some parents should get over themselves hey. :)
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Hey now! It's Halloween on Saturday. Always nice to see a festive holiday fall on the drunkenest day of the week. We call this Calendarial Serendipity. Just kidding. No one calls it that. That's idiotic.
Last year I took my kids trick or treating and came upon a house that was giving out full-sized candy bars. No lie. FULL FUCKING SIZE, BABY. When you're used to miniature and fun-sized candy on Halloween your whole life, seeing a full size Butterfinger in the basket is like staring at something the size of a BATTLESHIP. It's majestic and frightening all at once. No, no, no. I couldn't possibly consume a WHOLE candy bar. That would be piggish. Let me just eat an entire bag of very small portions of candy. Much healthier.
I've never had a good Halloween costume. Ever. One time, in 9th grade, I went to a friend's house dressed in a coat and tie and covered in blood, carrying an axe. I told everyone I was a stockbroker who had to pay alimony. My friend's mom told my mom. Both were highly disturbed by my choice.
DailyComedy.com | Joke :: SUZIE WONG, THE STOCK-BROKER THAT WILL ...
This is a right confabulation . Extended before the foam break asunder on Lose everything Drive last year, I worked as an unlicensed stockbroker. I was employed by a mignonne Taiwanese corporation in New York's Chinatown . People reach-me-down to ask me what i did for a living and I proudly told them , " I devote other people's simoleons until it's all gone ! "
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